The title of this post was inspired by the excellent A List Apart article by Erin Kissane (published on October 24, 2005). As Erin puts it:
“Youâ€™ve seen them around the web, these zombie sentences. Theyâ€™re not hard to recognize: syntax slack and drooling, clauses empty of everything but a terrible hunger for human brains.”
The following quotes are just a few examples from the extraordinary stream of zombie copy that is the d2e™ Logic website. The copy goes to such extremes of meaninglessness that I sometimes wonder whether this site/company was created as a joke. However, they actually used to be a client of my previous employer so this stuff is for real.
It seems that they also were great believers in irony when they decided to call their company d2e, which stands for down to earth.
In no particular order of preference (every single sentence is zombie copy of the highest quality):
“Together we’re breaking down the barriers to global synergies with innovative thought leadership and pragmatic transformation programmes that deliver on the promise of prosperity through partnership” (view)
“Our focus on people and processes not just data, helps us innovate new best practice underpinned with proven research and sound logic that comes with years of global eXperience.” (view)
“As our ecologies continue to grow, we’re seeing the emergence of collaborative ecosystems within globally connected communities whose members eXchange skills and eXperience in synergy” (view)
“Collaborative commercialisation projects that outreach the benefits of our solutions throughout specific markets in partnership with customers, leading experts and sector representatives.” (view)
“We do this by offering thought leadership and practical in-context case studies relevant to client interests, and we deliver this through consultancy arrangements and workshops designed to create synergy and add value for clients and their whole supply, design and value chain.” (view)